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Why exactly does society mock men who cannot laid?

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I'd like us to just stop for a minute and work back to first principles.

A typical, almost standard insult to certain men in Western society, and especially incels, is pure derision and mockery regarding their lack of sexual or relationship experience.

But if we think hard about it, why is that something to be mocked?

Men, by and large, are the ones who take on the risk of rejection by approaching, or asking a woman out. You will note that women, across most forms of dating or sexual matters, are far less frequently in the position of being rejected. Immediately therefore men have more pressure to handle rejection in trying to form a relationship. What if the man struggles with constant rejection? Does that make him a viable source of ridicule?

Many incels, truth be told, have a low tolerance for rejection and lack confidence. When women lack confidence or dislike rejection, they are still able to enter relationships and have sexual encounters by virtue of men having to do all the work in the initial stages.

Good-looking men of course will handle far less rejection; and the hypergamous nature of many/most women will mean average or worse men are subject to additional rejection.

I'm really baffled why, in today's society, a man should be mocked for not being able to experience intimacy - especially if he is trying. Do angry women get similarly mocked? I think not.

(It pained me not to use the word 'shitcunt' in this post, btw)
 
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boredpanda

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People mock other people who are inferior to them. A man who can't get laid has a low social value.
 
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I let it slip to my mates while I was playing drinking games that I'd never had a GF and was a virgin.

Now it gets brought up anywhere and to anyone...
 

Vertu

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People mock men who cannot get laid, because in the year 2015, if you cannot get laid then holy fucking LOL.

Getting laid is an effortless task in this day and age, period.

If you're unable to get laid then you're pretty much unable to do anything.
 
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Vertu said:
People mock men who cannot get laid, because in the year 2015, if you cannot get laid then holy fucking LOL.

Getting laid is an effortless task in this day and age, period.

If you're unable to get laid then you're pretty much unable to do anything.

I don't want a 2/10 landwhale or to pay for a whore...
 
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boredpanda

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Westphal said:
And someone who hasn't a partner CANT get one. Its the normal perception of ppl. No one ever thinks that maybe hes a vocel or even gay. Its easier to think in such sinple patterns.

An exemption is if the man has a high social value. Not having a gf he's consider as a man who lead his own path.
 
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Westphal said:
Someone with a gf has AUTOMATICALLY a higher social value simply bc his gf has chisen HIM among other guys ergo he must have something attractive others don't have. This alone makes gets him a higher S. 

And someone who hasn't a partner CANT get one. Its the normal perception of ppl. No one ever thinks that maybe hes a vocel or even gay. Its easier to think in such sinple patterns.

Different example:
A fat guy eats much and doesn't do any sport. Noone thinks of diabetes or lymphomas. 


The prejudices are the problems.

A legit post, West.
 
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Men are expected to perform certain functions for society and they are scorned if they fail or choose not to do so. 

(1) get a job

(2) pay taxes

(3) get married

(4) reproduce 

(5) take proper care of the kids

A man is expected to sacrifice himself for society and for his family. Anyone who doesn't do this is called "selfish" or "manchild"
 
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Westphal said:
Norwood Cemetery said:
Westphal said:
Someone with a gf has AUTOMATICALLY a higher social value simply bc his gf has chisen HIM among other guys ergo he must have something attractive others don't have. This alone makes gets him a higher S. 

And someone who hasn't a partner CANT get one. Its the normal perception of ppl. No one ever thinks that maybe hes a vocel or even gay. Its easier to think in such sinple patterns.

Different example:
A fat guy eats much and doesn't do any sport. Noone thinks of diabetes or lymphomas. 


The prejudices are the problems.

A legit post, West.

As if you hadn't known it  :biggrin:

I think you were being emotional bc of being triggered in some way. Its the emotionally vulnerable little inner kid of you that has written the thread, if you allow me to apply my amateur psychology knowledge i got from own therapy

Not quite. I accept the social prejudice argument, but my OP question is really asking aloud why these 'prejudices' are still valid, when the whole mechanics around dating and relationships has changed so dramatically.

The dating/sexual options for men is totally different in 2015 than it was in 1965.


MistGeburt3000 said:
Humanity has evolved but still our instincts are the same as in stoneage...

Precisely. Looks play an ever-increasing role in sexual selection - and acceptance campaigns, hypergamy etc contrive to ensure that females are never short-changed.
 
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I disagree with your premise NC. I haven't found mocking the perennially dateless to be such a staple insult amongst society. It does exist, for sure. It is considered a signal of a mans inadequacy, and when you want to mock someone, their inadequacies are as good a place to start as any.
 
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boredpanda

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Westphal said:
I myself was born in a small village where everyone post 25 but still not married(!) is already the black sheep. Ppl would even stigmatize childless couples as asocial. 

Not to mention religious ppl. 

You don't want to befriend with such ppl anyway so it's fucking equal what they think.

That's why I prefer living in a big city among other reasons. People are not interested in each other's lives if they don't personally know you.
 

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MyBalls YourChin said:
It is considered a signal of a mans inadequacy, and when you want to mock someone, their inadequacies are as good a place to start as any.

Pretty much.  This isn't really a mystery.  It's assumed that guys want to get laid, so if they can't it's a sign that they're powerless and inadequate in some way.  It's the same reason women over 30 without a boyfriend/husband are considered failures.  Women are assumed to want relationships, so if they fail they're inadequate and frustrated in some way.  If you can't get what you want, that's pathetic to some degree, and people just assume that men want lots of casual sex and women want relationships.
 

alien

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Unless you live in a country that actively aborts female fetuses, the male:female ratio in your age group is about 1.06:1 MAX. Unless you are very low status, you should be able to get a girlfriend.

As an autist, I find that getting laid is easier than getting a girlfriend because I'm a good looking guy but I don't have much going for me socially. Since my break up in January with my ex, I had a one-night stand in May, another one in June.

I got the sense at my workplace that my co-workers respected me a lot more when I had a girlfriend. My ex-boss was really happy for me when she found out I had a girlfriend. lol.

If they knew about the one-night stands I had, they would think that I was a playboy and would never dare to introduce me to any girls for fear that I would pump and dump. Even though I never actually pumped and dumped those two girls recently. It was a mutual break.

And on the flip side, if I didn't have one-night stands in between long stretches of being single, they'd just think I was a loser. And would never introduce me to women in their social circle.

You just can't win. 

If you're a 29 year old man who can't hold down a girlfriend, you're either a loser or a playboy manchild. Your social circle will not introduce you to single women at any rate.

I actually try to keep an open mind with women. But it seems like the majority of chronically single western women these days are absolutely fucking terrible in one way or another. If a woman is single for a long-time, it's for a reason. And it's not just women in their 30s+. I'm noticing this with women in their mid-20s too.

I no longer consider myself a part of the Manosphere. But if women want to think I'm sexist for saying this, go ahead, but if you are chronically single as a woman, there is a fucking problem! My ex is 29 years old and she got engaged with a man her parents picked out for her in 6 weeks. And my ex was a bit crazy. So that should tell you how easy the courtship process is for women if you are a woman of some value.

But yeah if you're one of those girls on POF, OKCupid and Tinder who are chronically single and you're in your fucking mid-20s+, 30+, there is a fucking reason for that. There is something about you that turns off men. And in many cases I find, it's the attitude and personality of many modern western women that turns me off.
 

sparta

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just lol at having a gf/wife in this day and age when you can have this:


























 

7dot

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It's an evolutionary advantage that people instinctively use to ultimately push them out of the gene pool.
Having a sub5 ethnic girlfriend gives you negative S, better looking/people with better looking girlfriends will secretly mock at you.
Having a plain jane as a girlfriend will make you more accepted within a low SMV group.
Having a hot girlfriend will make you envied/respected within a low-mid SMV group.
Just lol at dating sub7 girls.
 

7dot

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MistGeburt3000 said:
7dot said:
Having a sub5 ethnic girlfriend gives you negative S, better looking/people with better looking girlfriends will secretly mock at you.
.

i made the experience that it´s the people that are average or slight sub average in my own looksfield that speak the most shit behind my back, goodlooking people seldom do that they simply ignore that.

Im not talking about legit GL people, even tho they still talk shit within GL people-only groups (decently educated GL people, low-inhib GL people can talk shit at any given place).
Sub5 and sightly sub average talk shit as well, but the paradox is they usually think they are better looking than they are.
The worst type of shit talker are the ones dating subhuman girlfriends. I hate the feeling of having a conversation about how this or that girl looks like shit, when the person you are talking to is dating a non-attractive girlfriend himself. If I was legit aspie unable to act it out I would snap.
 
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