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is suicide over certain physical shortcomings worth it? what's the alternative?

ridiculously_likeable

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I'm still as tormented as I was a couple of days ago. I also started cutting my throat with a kitchen knife yesterday, but managed to stop myself, so I'd appreciate cancerous meme spammers to avoid this thread and my posts in general.

Most people here know who I am and what my biggest (recent, at least) issue is, so my question is - isn't it actually absolutely fucking retarded to feel like you are living in hell just because you arent genetically equipped to conquer the entire sexual market you are playing in?

I'm a diagnosed schizoid, among other things, and I'd actually be more than satisfied with a marriage with a decently sentient and decently looking woman. At least for the sake of having a company in older age, instead of ending up alone in your 50s, which must feel like auschwitz. When I observe other couples in my vicinity, I really don't see some genetic quality, yet they do manage to raise families and live meaningful lives. Still, 2 seconds after, I'm back on BDD and paranoid flashbacks of being rejected/humiliated because of sexual incompetence.

Also, I have a wonderful family, so I feel obliged to try to be happy/functional and ... stay alive for them. Friends as well. Such a shitty set of cards to be dealt with, ffs.

By the way, I confessed all the things I rage about here to my aunt, to which she started begging me to realise what I see in the mirror is not even remotely close to what everyone else sees. She even offered to find me a prostitute and pay her to have sex with me and school me on the sex issue. :mrgreen:  weird conversation to have for someone who had 6 girls from other classes asking him out in HS alone. But this is how having BDD (or actually being, unlike normies who just go through the wall in bliss and deal with problems by deluding themselves further, aware of your flaws, more precisely) does to you.

---

I know registering again strips me of credibility and integrity ... I had to come back and kill some more time, though, because I havent slept, eaten or breathed normally for over a week now. And I'll spend the next 16 hours or so alone, so spending that time with my thoughts might result in my reaching for that knife again.

I like my new posting style.
 

Josh

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didn't read past the first paragraph but no not being able to get laid is not a legitimate excuse to kill yourself at all imho
 

MajinBuu

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@"manchild"


Josh said:
didn't read past the first paragraph but no not being able to get laid is not a legitimate excuse to kill yourself at all imho

what rhymes with hope?
 

ridiculously_likeable

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Josh said:
didn't read past the first paragraph but no not being able to get laid is not a legitimate excuse to kill yourself at all imho

It's more frustrating than that. I'm more than capable of "getting laid" in the sense of having girls attracted to me. But my self-consciousness about certain bodyparts is so heartbreaking that my sexual inhibitions reach 100% the second I leave the house.
 
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Life sucks, people back in the old days couldn’t reflect about it too much because they were too busy fighting for their lives or trying to appease their basic survival needs.

Anything beyond basic survival needs and life becomes mundane. We need to fight for our food and our women daily so that when we are rewarded with these things it’s a huge positive mental release in our brain that makes us want to hunt for yearns to experience it again.

Now if you want, you can go eat whatever amazing tasting junk you want, and fuck a high quality whore for money. It’s over, there is no happiness anymore. The world is played out.
 

SuicideBomber

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paradigm_shifter said:
I'm still as tormented as I was a couple of days ago. I also started cutting my throat with a kitchen knife yesterday, but managed to stop myself, so I'd appreciate cancerous meme spammers to avoid this thread and my posts in general.

Most people here know who I am and what my biggest (recent, at least) issue is, so my question is - isn't it actually absolutely fucking retarded to feel like you are living in hell just because you arent genetically equipped to conquer the entire sexual market you are playing in?

I'm a diagnosed schizoid, among other things, and I'd actually be more than satisfied with a marriage with a decently sentient and decently looking woman. At least for the sake of having a company in older age, instead of ending up alone in your 50s, which must feel like auschwitz. When I observe other couples in my vicinity, I really don't see some genetic quality, yet they do manage to raise families and live meaningful lives. Still, 2 seconds after, I'm back on BDD and paranoid flashbacks of being rejected/humiliated because of sexual incompetence.

Also, I have a wonderful family, so I feel obliged to try to be happy/functional and ... stay alive for them. Friends as well. Such a shitty set of cards to be dealt with, ffs.

By the way, I confessed all the things I rage about here to my aunt, to which she started begging me to realise what I see in the mirror is not even remotely close to what everyone else sees. She even offered to find me a prostitute and pay her to have sex with me and school me on the sex issue. :mrgreen:  weird conversation to have for someone who had 6 girls from other classes asking him out in HS alone. But this is how having BDD (or actually being, unlike normies who just go through the wall in bliss and deal with problems by deluding themselves further, aware of your flaws, more precisely) does to you.

---

I know registering again strips me of credibility and integrity ... I had to come back and kill some more time, though, because I havent slept, eaten or breathed normally for over a week now. And I'll spend the next 16 hours or so alone, so spending that time with my thoughts might result in my reaching for that knife again.

I like my new posting style.

:cage: 

Not too bad, some points you got wrong tho.
 

manchild

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What happened? 

What's your issue?  If its your cock jfl.  Your cock is average, stop falling for PSL cancer.  

What's your last alt.

Please tell me you're trolling.  (PM if you want)
 
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ridiculously_likeable

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Kurt Loader said:
how big is your penis?

30 percentile length, 80 percentile girth, according to that graph bbcwhore posted.

so it's a mindfuck.
- on one hand, I'm just self fucking aware, and I cant just pretend I'm a superman when I'm clearly not. in any aspect of life, whether it's taking an exam, playing sports or doing anything else
- on the other, i'm pretty sure there are guys around my size who are married to perfectly fine girls. my brother is similar in size (he talked about it to his friends before + i found his  google searches that indicate so), and worse off in facial aesthetics, yet he hasn't been single since he was 15. and is currently dating a psl 5.5 or so scandinavian-looking 5ft10 blonde (who was after me a couple of years ago, but I ignored it)

so i cant help but think i'm just a self-sabotaging retard at times
 

manchild

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I'm sure those normie cucks you're taking about with the families don't even dick mog you.

And ofc they don't have F A C E like you do.

Anyway I thought manletism would be your death, imo its far more reasonable thing to get worked up over than cock size
 

ridiculously_likeable

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SuicideBomber said:
paradigm_shifter said:
I'm still as tormented as I was a couple of days ago. I also started cutting my throat with a kitchen knife yesterday, but managed to stop myself, so I'd appreciate cancerous meme spammers to avoid this thread and my posts in general.

Most people here know who I am and what my biggest (recent, at least) issue is, so my question is - isn't it actually absolutely fucking retarded to feel like you are living in hell just because you arent genetically equipped to conquer the entire sexual market you are playing in?

I'm a diagnosed schizoid, among other things, and I'd actually be more than satisfied with a marriage with a decently sentient and decently looking woman. At least for the sake of having a company in older age, instead of ending up alone in your 50s, which must feel like auschwitz. When I observe other couples in my vicinity, I really don't see some genetic quality, yet they do manage to raise families and live meaningful lives. Still, 2 seconds after, I'm back on BDD and paranoid flashbacks of being rejected/humiliated because of sexual incompetence.

Also, I have a wonderful family, so I feel obliged to try to be happy/functional and ... stay alive for them. Friends as well. Such a shitty set of cards to be dealt with, ffs.

By the way, I confessed all the things I rage about here to my aunt, to which she started begging me to realise what I see in the mirror is not even remotely close to what everyone else sees. She even offered to find me a prostitute and pay her to have sex with me and school me on the sex issue. :mrgreen:  weird conversation to have for someone who had 6 girls from other classes asking him out in HS alone. But this is how having BDD (or actually being, unlike normies who just go through the wall in bliss and deal with problems by deluding themselves further, aware of your flaws, more precisely) does to you.

---

I know registering again strips me of credibility and integrity ... I had to come back and kill some more time, though, because I havent slept, eaten or breathed normally for over a week now. And I'll spend the next 16 hours or so alone, so spending that time with my thoughts might result in my reaching for that knife again.

I like my new posting style.

:cage: 

Not too bad, some points you got wrong tho.

feel free to correct me. i'm completely out of my mind since last monday.

there are more hilarious details but i couldnt fit it all in (no pun intended), nobody would even read this if i wasnt the first and only forum chad


manchild said:
I'm sure those normie cucks you're taking about with the families don't even dick mog you.

And ofc they don't have F A C E like you do.

Anyway I thought manletism would be your death, imo its far more reasonable thing to get worked up over than cock size

that's my point exactly. if everyone around me with ltr/wife and kids was some 6ft2 high energy high prenatal t jock, it would be more reasonable to worry. but in real life, most people will never even encounter an actual chad or stacy, or talk to them. it's far more shitty than psl fantasy world.

interestingly, i dont give a flying fuck about my height, even though the percentile is probably as bad. it's less embarrassing and demoralizing somehow


i'm not trolling, just using this place to let it out because people will actually understand where i come from

rl_replenished is my last alt
 

D O G

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There are no absurd, or stupid reasons to commit suicide. It doesn't matter if it's worth it or not, we're all going to catch the bus someday. It doesn't matter if you end it all today, the next week, or in ten years. It's your choice.
 

ridiculously_likeable

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D O G said:
There are no absurd, or stupid reasons to commit suicide. It doesn't matter if it's worth it or not, we're all going to catch the bus someday. It doesn't matter if you end it all today, the next week, or in ten years. It's your choice.

I feel bad for my family and friends.

If it wasnt for them, I probably would have ended it long ago (unrelated to this looks and sex obsessed psl spergfest)
 
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paradigm_shifter said:
D O G said:
There are no absurd, or stupid reasons to commit suicide. It doesn't matter if it's worth it or not, we're all going to catch the bus someday. It doesn't matter if you end it all today, the next week, or in ten years. It's your choice.

I feel bad for my family and friends.

If it wasnt for them, I probably would have ended it long ago (unrelated to this looks and sex obsessed psl spergfest)

Maybe it’s time to accept that you’re not perfect and put yourself out there to fail at things. It’s obviously gonna suck to realize that you’re not the best at everything and people mog you at stuff but it’s far better than your delusional reality now. At least you’ll be at peace with your existence.
 

headache

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Try jelqing?

Thinking you’re making a difference is great for the brain
 

ridiculously_likeable

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Roger The Rapist said:
paradigm_shifter said:
I feel bad for my family and friends.

If it wasnt for them, I probably would have ended it long ago (unrelated to this looks and sex obsessed psl spergfest)

Maybe it’s time to accept that you’re not perfect and put yourself out there to fail at things. It’s obviously gonna suck to realize that you’re not the best at everything and people mog you at stuff but it’s far better than your delusional reality now. At least you’ll be at peace with your existence.

Yes, I should just deal with it instead of trying to contemplate and reddit-search my way out of it.

headache said:
Try jelqing?

Thinking you’re making a difference is great for the brain

Every form of physical self-improvement that isn't basic hygiene (and maybe moderate working out/playing some sports) is extremely counter-productive psychologically. Specially idiotic and dubious activities like the one you mentioned. I might add 1 time surgeries (that actually do something - like rhinoplasty, fixing dumbo ears, dental implants etc) here, but that's about it.
 

Unbeatable

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You mentally weak loser

you're a loss cause

seriously. you need a mental hospital at least. id understand if you profited from this site due to looksmaxxing or making money from it but you just write autistic shit

make friends and 

 

SuicideBomber

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Unbeatable said:
You mentally weak loser

you're a loss cause

seriously. you need a mental hospital at least. id understand if you profited from this site due to looksmaxxing or making money from it but you just write autistic shit

make friends and 


Cope, he is probably the strongest user mentally here.
 
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