The thought struck me last night that he's actually bi and been sending me signals all along. Now, I can't get the thought out of my head so Google brought me here.
To start, a little about my self. We're both 19 for the record. Sure I'm a little confused about my self. Both men and women get it up (so to speak). When I first started watching porn as a kid it was all women. But quite some time after I became friends with the guy in high school I started thinking about him sexually. Eventually finding guys have similar traits in porn did for me. Sure I'm still a little confused, I identify to others as straight and come off that way. I guess it's a little hard to gauge when my only experience with naked women is at a strip club but I'm not fully into the idea of man on man sex. Anal seems to creep me out. It just seems like foreplay is what I dig and I sometimes think about my friend in that way. Really it's only been a few weeks that I've been able to admit this to my self that I'm not gay but I still have certain bisexual tendencies (as the whole "I might be gay" thing was real confusing).
Now, as for my friend he's in a different situation. To describe the guy in one word it would be "horny". I might of questioned some of his decisions if I was him but to say the least even as a college student he's had sex with more girls than the average man does in his lifetime. I don't know if he'd consider me his best friend also as he got 2 or 3 other close friends but I'm defiantly in that inner circle and there's things he'd tell me that he wouldn't others. He's comfortable around he, I come over and he's off walking around the house in his underwear with his hand down there. Truth is that's something he'll do around other people. This guy often has his hand on his dick.
Thing is he's always been toughy feely. I remember in one class in high school where he would just feel me up (not in a sexual way, we where in class) just touching my chest, rub his hand across my facial hair. There's been a few occurrences of this sort of thing even to this day (maybe a little less so). I always brushed it off never thought much of that. But he often touches me, rubs his hand across my facial hair. Stuff like that.
We've gotten drunk and cuddled. I was going to sleep and he came in and said let's cuddle. This was mostly me sort of out of it and him laying atop/aside me. I never really engaged in him so much with these kind of occurrences but never pushed him away. I remember once leaving a party and we where walking to my house as he was staying the night and asked on the way there if we were going to cuddle. I didn't respond not sure what to make of it. I didn't want to seem gay. But come to think of it the guy enjoys cuddling with me.
About a year ago we where on the train going to work (train car was pretty much empty) and he was cuddling up next to me arm around all cozy. I wasn't uncomfortable but it didn't seem like something a straight person would do. I looked it him as if to ask what's up and he smiled and straight up said he was bi (or bi curious or something). But I didn't reply (and at that time wasn't even able to admit to my self that that describes me as well) so he just shrugged it off said he's "joking". Even when we got to work then just sitting on the bench outside before hand he was still kind of cuddled up against me.
I've also seen his dick. So there's that. Not necessarily in person but just that his latest girlfriend really loved the camera and wanted them having sex to be filmed all the time. He sent me some of these tapes and it was mostly just him getting blown. I don't think he ever showed any of his other friends only me (at least that's what he told me). Once his then girlfriend snap chatted me a picture his his dick right after they where done fucking, just hanging there while he had a tablet in his hands filming the thing. Just the other day when I was hanging out at his place he asked me if I wanted anything eat, food, or drink or something. "Want something" "no" "want my dick?" and repeated a few times that he wanted me to suck his dick then when I didn't say anything and walked away to the washroom he's just like "ah I'm kidding". Not sure what to make of this, really straight guys fuck around like that but there's seriousness in jokes sometimes.
What do you guys make of this? I'm starting to feel like he's been giving me the ques but I never engaged or showed him that I feel the same way. How do I give him the same signs without going overboard. What if I'm wrong about how he feels about me? I don't want to fuck up our friendship or come off as gay (I don't even have the experience with girls to show otherwise).